Are you okay?
The last few months have been very interesting... scratch that, that last couple of years or so have been incredibly interesting... Each year seems to get tougher and tougher but each year I find I engage and deal with the challenges better. One common theme has been incredibly prevalent, reflecting on the last few years... IDENTITY... what a cliche but so incredibly vital to our micro-worlds and in turn, collectively, our macro-world.
There have been a few events that have caused me to start asking really important, yet tough questions. The kind you generally don't want to ask yourself and I realized I had been avoiding them, subconsciously, but avoiding them nonetheless.
Questions like, "Why do you do what you do?", "Why do I respond the way I do?", but no question has been as important as the following one... "Are you okay... with yourself?" In other words, do you accept yourself for who you are or... do you accept the entirety of yourself, complexities, shortcomings, quirks, oddities and wonder of who you were created to be. To be honest, I didn't and still don't...
That lead me to allow people to tell me who I am, how to live and try fill a shoe that was never mine to fill at the expense of my favourite shoes - my own!
You see, none of the others questions are nearly as important as this one - this is the question that informs and creates the baseline for the answers to all the other plethora of questions you may have (I sometimes use big and convoluted words but that's okay - something I suppressed for a long time because I wasn't okay... with who I am). When we are okay... with who we are, we are free to create - create a life worth living, a life of significance (Thanks, RJ!) and a life that impacts those around us meaningfully!
When we are not okay with ourselves, we are not okay... and that extends into every area of who you are because you have to wear masks (not to deceive, but to survive). We can never fully give all of who we are to something or someone or create and live wildly, unreservedly, unapologetically and with the fullness of the unique flair that is you and me and who we truly are!
It is important to note that this isn't coming from a place to say I am okay with who I am and I don't need to change - we all have aspects of who we are that need to undergo some form of improvement or transformation - pressing and into that because in doing so, we become even more of who we are. So don't try skip out on that one! ;)
I am not going to hide behind the "This is a moment of me being vulnerable" , because, I believe I shouldn't... That would mean I have to disclaim that because I am afraid of whoever is reading this being insensitive toward the openness and essence of what I am sharing and who I am - I am open and that is good enough and I am learning to be okay with that and it is so freeing.
I am becoming more and more okay with who I am and I have discovered so much about myself in these short few months, I can't wait for what lies ahead. It helps me mature and realize that in being okay with myself I handle and am not as "not okay" (read cope/respond better) with challenges I face. It is still sore, uncomfortable and tough but the more okay I am with myself the more rooted I find myself.
In this, my conquest has been to help others move in that direction too - by encouraging, speaking life and living compassionately toward others.
You can quickly tell if someone holds back on an aspect of who they are. Instead of getting awkward about it, let's draw the hidden treasure and gold out of each other and help each other become okay... with who we are. It's an active move but I deeply believe we'll see people come alive and alive people bring life wherever they are, living lives of life untamed.
Find people that call that out in you and do the same, in compassion, for others. The world deserves to have the best okay with yourself you can offer because the world needs people of life-filled lives!